The Pleasures of Breaking Rules

When I was in elementary school, I fell in love with
a little Italian boy named Ricky Spagnolia
He had beautiful olive skin and, he had fashion sense.
Leather shoes, leather jackets, gold on display.
We would walk home from school each day holding
hands.
And, his hand felt good in mine.
It felt right.
We would kiss. Ricky Spagnolia.
But, the White students told him not to date me because
I was a "nigger." But, his opinion was, "Who the hell are they?"
He kissed me every day. Every kiss desired by me.
When my birthday party came, his mother forbade him to come
When he asked her if we could "play date" his mother refused.
And I wept, but he kissed me and told me if she had accepted
he would have dated me until we were done with high school then
married me because I was "a better 'woman.'"
Then, people who hated Italians living in Wilkinsburg spray
painted Rick's white home with ethnic hate the white exterior a
trembling, non-retaliatory canvas.
And, Ricky came to me and told me, "Romella, my family is
moving. This is dangerous stuff. They may try to kill us. We have
the money to leave so we are. But, I will love you for as long as I live."

And, I cried every bit of water content in my body all the way
out, out into the Aegean sea.
Ricky Spagnolia, his father letting us kiss and hug goodbye, even when
his mother said it shouldn't happen.
His warm hugs gone, his soft gentle ways.
The weeds grew up around his house quickly, shot through the windows.
Weeds are all that is left sometimes and a little girl, standing on the side
walk her memories flooding back, a little girl crying into her sorrow, a dollar
"engagement band" on her finger. Weeds, breaking the windows, grass beating
with green fists through the sidewalk's concrete. "Romella, I don't care if you are
Black. Us Italians got some Black in us, too. But, Mama lies and says no. Romella, I will marry and shit but I will always remember you. None of that forgetting shit. I
promise. Girl, I love you so. It ain't just gonna go the hell away." Ricky, I will
always remember you too and shit...I really will.