Beating Up Gary Cooper

Well, almost beating up Gary Cooper.
Imagine the rush as a second-rate character actor
even a first-rate baddie — gets to hit,
well, pretend hit,
one of the screen's legends,
even if he did have to sneak up.

They would always have to sneak up
'cause that would be their only chance
against Coop. And the retribution,
forget about it. I once saw him
beat someone up and then take his pants off:
"Man of the West", it was. Some man.
Even Lee J. Cobb was speechless,
but pleased.

Thanks, Gary for taking those lumps,
well, pretend lumps;
it made all our lives seem fairer, better.